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Oct. 12, 2013

Our last EncountHer on Saturday, Oct. 12th - Relationships Part 2 - was awesome! Our focus was about wisdom, how we acquire it and how we use it to make good choices and decisions in our lives, specifically in our relationships.

It was a beautiful and insightful time of dialogue and sharing - celebrating our successes and examining some of the challenges we have faced and how we overcame! We agreed that we are all “ a work in progress” and that we intend to enjoy this life’s journey. It was a wonderful time of sharing and connecting.

I also enjoyed sharing relationship insights with our single ladies. We talked about the natural human desire for companionship with security. They concluded that being single means you are a “whole” person, not needing a man to “complete” you. But at the same time, there's nothing wrong with wanting to get married, but there is also great joy, fulfillment and freedom in embracing your singleness. We also talked about how for some of us there is an unconscious purpose in seeking a relationship. Sometimes we find ourselves looking for someone to heal our emotional wounds and to meet our unfulfilled needs. A tall order for another flawed human being who may be looking for the same thing.

It was all about making wise choices. For instance, if you know the relationship is not going to last for the long term, why would it be worth your time and energy for the short term? Is anything really better than nothing? Is quantity really better than quality?

We need to take better care of ourselves so that we can then care for others. We talked about the first step in seeking a meaningful relationship – which is to first seek a relationship with God, so that you will be in a position to receive wisdom and insight from Him regarding all the issues of life. Could there a better source of wisdom? I think not.

Our wisdom phrases for the day were:

-        "A woman's heart should be so hidden in God

          that a man has to seek Him just to find her." Maya Angelou

-        “You get what you accept” RR

-        "You have to give your love away in order for it to grow".

We’re looking forward to our next EncountHer on Saturday, November 9, 2013 – same time, same place.

Our topic will be “Let God Process You”….

What is “the Process”? Want to know more? Join us on November 9!

Ultimately, some of us will smile and feel blessed, some of us will rethink our choices and others will learn how to prepare.

Join me in this prayer:

Heavenly Father, Today, I come asking for wisdom; in particular, wisdom about who I am as a relational and emotional person.

Father, continue to show me the difference between a healthy investment in people’s lives, versus an unhealthy entanglement and enmeshment. The calling to love others, as Jesus loves us, will always be costly, and most times will require more of me than I'm ready to give, but please show me what good relational boundaries look like.

Grant me grace to offer people a non-anxious presence, and a genuine taste of your compassionate and tender heart. Help me know the difference between validating the emotions of others, versus taking responsibility for their emotions. Unfortunately, my default mode is to try “fix” people who are emotionally “on edge”; but I acknowledge, yet again, that you’re not calling me to fix anybody, but to love everybody. Help me to listen from my heart, and to discern what’s really going on in the struggles and stories of others.

I also need wisdom, Father, about my own emotional world. Help me know what my emotions are telling me—what idols they reveal; what growth in grace they require; what healing in my story remains in front of me. Show me what taking care of myself looks like; versus, withdrawing into self-protection, unbelief and depression.

Father, just praying this prayer stirs up so many other thoughts and feelings inside my heart. My joy is in knowing that we can keep this conversation going throughout the day, and well beyond. My great joy is in knowing that you will give me the wisdom I need, and you will do so generously.

Because the gospel is true, I’m certain I live in the state of your permanent favor and delight. That’s my peace and the immovable anchor for my soul. I so look forward to the Day of a glorified me, and a glorified everything! In Jesus’ bold and beautiful name. AMEN!

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